For years, I wondered how I could be more of a giver. Not just with money but with my time and my impact on the less fortunate around me. I have friends who have volunteered at soup kitchens. My kids have made and delivered greeting cards for children stuck in hospital rooms. Every year, I read the winning WCI Scholarship essays and marvel at the selflessness and sacrifice many of them have had to make.
I’ve been disappointed in myself at times, knowing that, as my wife and I continue to build our skills at earning and investing, I should be doing more to help my fellow citizens. I even talked to 2022 WCICON keynote speaker Michelle Singletary and wrote a column about it to try to motivate myself (and WCI readers) to spend more time thinking about charitable giving.
My wife and I started a Donor Advised Fund in 2025, and we give money and items to the causes we care about. I give blood a couple of times per year. But I continued to berate myself because I wasn’t being of service enough. I wasn’t giving enough of my time.
At the end of 2024, I realized something. Maybe I can’t change the world, but I can at least impact those who need help locally—even if it’s just one-on-one. I signed up as a substitute driver for Meals on Wheels, the mission of which is “to empower local community programs to improve the health and quality of life of the seniors they serve so that no one is left hungry or isolated.”
As a Meals on Wheels volunteer, you receive a route of people who need food delivered to their home, you gather the hot meals from a designated pickup point, you drive to their front doors, and you distribute the food. Sometimes, it’s a five-second interaction with the client. Sometimes, we end up talking for 10 minutes. Either way, the volunteer and the one who’s receiving the meal are making a positive impact on each other.
I have long asked myself: What’ve I done to help? What should I do to help?
Finally, I had my answer.
I’m loath to praise myself in public forums (I thought long and hard about whether I should even write this column), but Dr. Jim Dahle’s podcast on How to Maximize the Impact of Your Charitable Giving last May inspired me. As he said,
“I’m a little hesitant to talk about it on the podcast, to talk about it on the blog, to give specific amounts that we’re giving or what organizations or people we’re giving it to, because I fear it will come across as a humble brag. It’s like saying, ‘I bought a Ferrari,’ to say you gave away enough money to buy a Ferrari. It comes across as a humble brag either way. I don’t want to do that, but I do want to encourage people to give. The reason for that, the data is very clear, actually. Givers have been shown to be happier, healthier, and wealthier. I’m doing you a disservice by not talking more about giving.”
With that in mind, here’s what I’ve learned since giving more of my time to others.
It Brings Me Joy
My week doesn’t feel complete anymore if I haven’t given 60-90 minutes of my time to Meals on Wheels and delivered six, seven, or eight meals to those in need. If I skip a week or two, I feel a little less joy.
Here’s a quick story.
A few months ago, I delivered to a client who wasn’t answering my door knocks. I called the listed phone number on my route rundown sheet, and I reached his daughter, who told me he couldn’t hear a knock on the door but that he would respond to a ringing doorbell. The problem was that on the route sheet, it didn’t say anything about his hearing or that he wanted the deliverer to press the doorbell (if the sheet doesn’t say anything about ringing the doorbell, I don’t ring the doorbell).
After 10 minutes of texting back and forth with the daughter, I returned to his front door and found him waiting on me with a smile. After leaving, I called the Meals on Wheels office to request an amendment to the directions on the route sheet to make sure the client (aka a “neighbor”) wouldn’t potentially miss the knock and his meal the next time.
A few weeks later, I substituted on that route again. At the end of the directions, the route sheet now read, “Please ring doorbell, client won’t hear knock.” I delivered the food with a smile. He bowed his head and thanked me. The interaction, and the fact that I had made the slightest bit of difference in how he received his food, was the highlight of my day.
As one volunteer told me a couple of weeks later as we waited in line to pick up our deliveries for the day, “I think I get more out of this than the neighbors do.”
It Gives Me the Perspective I Need
I’m not the kind of person to take time out of my schedule to sit down and specifically practice gratitude. But when I make my deliveries, it gives me the perspective I need. It forces me to reckon with how lucky my life has been and what my privilege has helped bring me.
I’ve delivered meals to dilapidated shacks and mobile homes in need of repair. I’ve delivered to homes worth nearly $1 million. Some of these neighbors were born into poverty and do all they can to survive. Some of these neighbors made good money at stable jobs before life got cruel and took most of it away. Some are disabled and confined to their homes. Some are trapped inside by the boxes they hoard.
I’m not a religious person, but the thought of “There but for the grace of God go I” is often present in my mind when I’m driving for Meals on Wheels. I never fail to say my thanks (or at least think about it) when I’m done delivering for the day.
It Shows My Kids the Importance of Giving
I’ve taken my teenage kids with me on routes a few times. They walk with me to the door, and they’re the ones who pass the food into grateful hands.
When they know I’ve made deliveries during the day, they sometimes ask me about it when they get home from school. Sometimes, I tell them silly stories about what happened on the route. Sometimes I update them on my quest to find the closest route to my house.
The kids don’t know how much money we’re putting in our DAF. But they know that we’re donating our time. Hopefully, my experience (even if I’m talking about it in a casual way, as just a normal part of my day) will motivate them to give back at some point in the future. Hopefully, they’ll get started on that charitable journey much earlier than I did because I helped show them the way with my actions.
It Makes Me Appreciate the Present
Right now, my left ankle bothers me if I play too much tennis. My back is occasionally sore when I go to my boutique gym. My turf toe hurts if I ignore my stretching routine. But I can hike 140 miles in 12 days in the New Mexico mountain backcountry. I can go hard on the tennis court for more than two hours. I can (attempt to) wakeboard on Lake Powell.
My body is healthy, and I can still sprint fast on a treadmill.
But I know these moments are fleeting, and I’m reminded of that every day I deliver when it says on the route sheet, “Slow to the door” or “Give neighbor extra time to respond.” Many of the clients are older, and their bodies are failing them. They’re shuffling around with walkers or moving in wheelchairs.
I envision a day where I’ll be slow to the door or need assistance to do the most mundane of daily activities. It makes me live in and appreciate the present.
Realizing Food Insecurity Is Still a Major Problem
According to the 2026 Capital Area Food Bank Hunger Report, food insecurity in the greater Washington DC area is at a five-year high. I imagine that’s true throughout other areas of the country.
As the report mentions,
“Additionally, the state of food security more broadly is deteriorating. More households are reporting that their finances are worsening, and for the first time since the survey’s inception in 2022, fewer than half of the region’s households report high confidence in their ability to get the food they need.”
I’ve had Meals on Wheels neighbors ask me whether the federal government’s safety net will collapse. I’ve wondered myself if government cuts will allow entities like Meals on Wheels to survive. Maybe this is not something high earners think about much. But now I think about it all the time.
I was finishing a delivery last month, the last run I’d make before I knew I would write this column, and as I was pulling into my driveway, a 2020 song from Jason Isbell called What I’ve Done to Help began playing on my car stereo.
It’s not necessarily a song about giving to charity, but the lyrics have run through my brain constantly since then.
As Isbell told Apple Music,
“Most of what I’m talking about . . . is trying to be as aware as possible and not just get lost in your own selfish bubble, because sometimes the hardest thing to do is to be honest with yourself. I was writing, I think, about preexisting social conditions that really [COVID] just exacerbated or at least turned a light on. We had a lot of division between the people that have and the people that don’t, and I think it’s made pretty obvious now.”
Isbell sings,
“What’ve I done to help? What’ve I done to help? Somebody saved me/What’ve I done to help? What’ve I done to help? And not myself?”
For 90 minutes a few times per month, I don’t have to berate myself. I’m being of service to my community, and I’m better for it.
More information here:Money Song of the Week
As long as we’re talking about donating your time, let’s briefly discuss the most famous song about that topic: 1985’s We Are the World. A few years ago, I watched a Netflix documentary on the making of the song and the music video, and it made me fall in love with the tune all over again.
The original recording sold more than 7 million copies, and it raised more than $80 million (about $249 million in 2026 dollars) for humanitarian aid. As the songwriters, Lionel Richie and Michael Jackson, knew more than 40 years ago, when you give to charity, you also receive something back.
As everybody sings,
“There’s a choice we’re making/We’re saving our own lives/It’s true we’ll make a better day, just you and me.”
Apropos of absolutely nothing, here are my three favorite moments from the video.
- Think about this. Prince declined to participate because the song organizers wouldn’t give him his own room where he could record a guitar solo (if you watch his playing from a George Harrison tribute in 2004, you could see how the We Are the World organizers probably made a mistake in not ceding to his demands). Bob Denver and Madonna also were not asked to take part in the song.
- I can’t decide whether Cyndi Lauper is brilliant or just plain obnoxious. I lean toward the former. Either way, I love her 11-second contribution to the tune.
- Why is Dan Aykroyd in the background singing? According to USA for Africa, he brought his “infectious energy to the cause.”
Which leads me to believe that bringing infectious energy to your charitable giving is just as important as being the star of the show.
More information here:Instagram Reel of the Week
I applaud the bravery of the doc making this argument.
In case you need a refresher, make sure to check out this scene from Cool Runnings.
Are you satisfied with your charitable giving, either with your time or with your money? Why or why not? Are there ways you could become a better giver?
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