By Dr. James M. Dahle, WCI Founder
This post was originally just a collection of random thoughts about private schools, a rant if you will. I was sure I would offend many of you who have your kids in private school. Instead of running just a big long rant, my assistant editor Jill said she wanted to turn it in to a Pro/Con post and she volunteered to write the Pro part. So my part will be the Con and hers will be the Pro. Just remember that I don't care what you do with your money as long as you can afford it. You want to blow it on travel, wakeboat gas, private school, or whatever, it's your choice so long as you can do it and still put 20% toward retirement. All right, here we go.
Cons of Private School – The White Coat Investor
Random Thought #1 – Private School Is a Big Rock
I often talk about the big rocks in your personal finances. This “big rock” phrase comes from the famous thought experiment where you try to fit a certain amount of rocks, gravel, and sand into a jar. If you start with the big rocks, everything fits in. If you start with the sand, there's no room for the gravel, much less the big rocks. The point is to pay attention to the big rocks first. This is in opposition to the Latte Factor as made famous by Bach, i.e. the idea that if you just stop buying lattes you'll be rich eventually. I would advocate that it is far easier to just pay attention to the big rocks and then you can have all the lattes you want. Since we all only have a limited amount of willpower to tell ourselves “no,” it is far better to use that limited willpower on the big rocks in our financial lives.
So what are the big rocks in your budget? Housing and transportation certainly qualify. So do vacations and state income taxes. But guess what else belongs in there? That's right, private school. I mean look at what it costs. In my area, it's about $10K per year per kid, and I'm told that is really cheap compared to places like the Bay Area and D.C. where it might be $30K per year per kid. But whether you have 6 kids in Utah or 2 kids in California, $60K a year in tuition is a huge rock. $60K a year invested at 5% real for 13 years is over a million dollars, $2.4M if you let it continue to compound for another 17 years at that rate. According to surveys of physicians in their 60s, about 57% have a net worth of less than $2 Million.
Shop carefully for the big rocks.
Random Thought #2 – Private School Affects Public Schools
Okay, here's where our bias comes in. Our kids are all in public schools. We went to public schools. We volunteer in public schools. My wife worked in public schools. Her mother worked in public schools. Her grandparents worked in public schools (and her grandfather was a superintendent). Nobody in my family has EVER gone to a private high school. We live in an area with excellent public schools. We are big supporters of public schools. In fact, with this most recent election, the only sign we had in our yard was a pro-school bond sign.
That said, one of the big beefs I have with private schools is their tendency to siphon off resources that could go toward the public school system. No matter what you believe, it is pretty hard to argue that public schools are not providing a societal good that benefits all of us. A better-educated citizenry improves the economy, society, and government for all of us.
When the children of the educated, wealthy, and/or moral are removed from public schools in order to get a “better” education, that leaves those in the public schools worse off. Kids learn not only from their teachers but also from their peers. That goes for scholastic and non-scholastic subjects. Private schools may also siphon off the most talented and dedicated teachers, although I suppose I have no data to support that. Parents that are likely to put their kids in private schools are also those most likely to be very supportive of the school—i.e., volunteer time, donate extra money, ensure their kids are on top of their school work and behavior, etc. Removing those kids and their parents from the public school system decreases the societal benefit of the public school system for all of us. Don't get me wrong, private school attending families are paying the same property taxes as everyone else, but there's a lot more to support than just paying your taxes.
Random Thought #3 – Financially, It's Usually Better to Move
I get this question a lot. A family feels like they live in an area where the public schools are lousy and they are trying to decide whether to move to a more expensive area and put their kids in public schools or stay where they're at and pay for private school tuition. The right answer is usually to move, whether it is just down the street or to another state. The reason boils down to basic math.
When you pay private school tuition, that money is gone. When you buy a more expensive house, the value of the house is likely to keep up with inflation and then come back to you eventually. Plus, the cost of the house is a one-time expense rather than a recurring one.
Consider this scenario: You can live in a $400K house with crummy schools and pay $40K a year in private school tuition or you can live in an $800K house with great public schools. Over the course of 13 years, you will have paid $40K * 13 = $520,000 in tuition. That money is just gone. If you had spent the extra $400K, and the house appreciated at 3%, you'd be $187K ahead, instead of $520K behind, a difference of $700K. Now, you have to reduce that by the additional property taxes. Perhaps that's $5K–$10K a year. And most people aren't paying cash for their house, so there would be some additional interest costs and maybe some additional maintenance costs. Perhaps $10K–$20K a year. And the realtor fees would be higher. But the fact remains that all that added up isn't going to come close to $700K. You've got to really love your job and the area you live to give up an extra $700K for it.
Random Thought #4 – Benefits Are Typically Oversold
We know lots of people who put their kids in private school for various reasons. I haven't been particularly impressed that their kids are smarter or more well-rounded or more likely to succeed or more moral than those attending good public schools. Nor have I seen any data that supports that contention. You may feel differently, of course, but it seems to me that a great deal of the “private school benefit” is a status symbol. I also think a lot of people hear that the public schools are “bad” but never actually get involved or really investigate whether that is really true. I mean, sure, if your public schools really are terrible or unsafe, then I can't blame you for using your discretionary income on a luxury like private school. But at least go find out if they really are terrible—don't just take your neighbor's word for it.
Random Thought #5 – Cost Matters, Even with Education
On a related note, I am amazed how our cost blinders go on as soon as we start talking about education. I usually discuss this with regards to a college education, but it applies just as much to a grade or high school education. The value proposition is particularly acute when the alternative is completely free (at least of an additional cost beyond the required property taxes).
Go down the US News and World Report college rank list some time. You'll see colleges that are ranked the same for their academic merits but have 4–8 times the cost of tuition. Your children need significant guidance to make a wise college choice. They shouldn't be choosing a college because they think the buildings are pretty or their friend from high school is going there. It's a value proposition. What is the price and how good is the education. Sure, the education might be a little better at one college than another, but it likely isn't 8 times as good.
The same rules apply to grade school and high school. Just because the class size might be 20% smaller doesn't mean the education is 20% better. How much is it worth to have your kids learn geometry from someone who shares your religion? Is a 20 point higher average SAT really worth $100K in tuition? Those are the questions to ask yourself. It isn't just about “what's better.” It's also a value proposition.
I mean, don't you think it's amazing to see parents paying private school tuition for their kids when they haven't even finished paying for their own education yet? What message are you sending to your kids with that sort of behavior? That living your whole life in debt is normal? Is that really your intent?
We need to get out of this mindset that “I'd do anything for my kids” when “anything” includes stuff that makes no financial sense at all. Why don't you give them a choice? They can either attend private schools or you can give them $700K in today's money when they turn 40. The right answer for most kids is going to be “take the money.”
Now you have to know your kids too; some kids need services and experiences only available from a private institution. And we all have discretionary income we can spend any way we like. So if you want to spend your money on private schools, knock yourself out. But do your finances a favor and at least consider the financial implications of your choice before making it.
By Jill Gygi, Former WCI Assistant Editor
If Excellent Education Is a Priority, Make the Necessary Sacrifices
Over the past 20 years we’ve tried it all! We’ve homeschooled our kids, had them in private school, neighborhood public schools as well as charter schools, all in an effort to provide them the best education for their different needs. Jim and I are neighbors and we live in one of the top school districts in the State of Utah, but still, the schools have often come up short and I have felt compelled at times to seek better educational opportunities for my children.
If Jim had just left this post about private school being a big rock and that you should be very careful about choosing that big rock, I would have edited the post, published it, and left it at that! But, after reading his other thoughts on education I felt that I really needed to address his five main points.
First day of Kindergarten for Jill's youngest.
Pros of Private School – Jill
#1 Private School Is a Big Rock
I couldn’t agree more. The years we had one of our kids in private school, we were keenly aware of the big rock that it was, and we made significant cuts in other areas of our budget to allow it to make sense financially.
My husband and I chose private school for a time because our local public school couldn't meet our daughter's needs. She was reading and doing math well above her grade level. Public schools, no matter how good they are, have limited options for teaching a child that doesn't conform. The best they could offer my daughter was to give her extra worksheets for home. They expected her to play along nicely sounding out P-A-T even though she was reading Chronicles of Narnia at home. They also expected her to be patient as others learned to identify numbers while she was experimenting with multiplication at home. How could I sentence her to an education far less than her capabilities? To do so would be a waste of her mind.
When we didn't have the income to justify private school, I homeschooled two of my boys for about four years. Now, THAT was a sacrifice and a labor of love. A teacher at our top-rated elementary school told me that my son was so different from the rest of the class that she didn’t have a way to teach him effectively. What is a parent to do in that kind of situation? Well, I wasn't just going to leave him there with little being taught. I bought a curriculum for a few hundred dollars that met his needs and I taught him myself! Every bit of sacrifice of my time and money was worth seeing my kids work to rise to their potential.
#2 Private Schools Affect Public Schools
I know Jim is well-meaning in his defense of public schools but if a public school isn't giving a child the best learning opportunities, should that child be sacrificed to the “public good?” Just because Jim is biased toward government education doesn’t inherently make it the moral “good” or the right fit for every kid in America—rich or poor.
It's not that I'm against government-run schools. I believe they are a public good and the right fit for many situations. What I’m against is people resenting, compelling, shaming, or legislating against others who choose an alternative. Physicians don’t seem to like it when well-meaning people say that they owe a debt to society for putting them through medical school. I don’t like it when people say that my debt to society is to sacrifice my children's education to systems that may not be working for a child.
#3 Financially, It Is Better to Move
Jim suggests that private schools “siphon off ” bright kids and families that are needed in the public schools and that those families basically have a moral responsibility to stay in the government system. However, his next argument is that it is a smart financial decision to buy your way out of a crummy school by purchasing an expensive home in a great school district. Using his logic, wouldn't then those “great public schools” be themselves, “siphoning off” the brightest kids and families from the crummy public schools that need them most? Wouldn't the greatest moral good be to move INTO a poorly performing public school? Of course not! That would be absurd.
Like Jim, I think moving into a great school district to better your children's educational situation is a perfectly viable option for a family. Likewise, opting out of the government system is just as viable an option and no less moral of a decision.
#4 Benefits Are Typically Oversold
Jim hasn't been overly impressed with kids who've attended private schools. My experiences have been different. We've found the benefits of our educational choices to be outstanding. At the private school our daughter attended, she was taught a rigorous curriculum. She, along with every student, was assigned to breakout learning groups that matched her academic level. Students were taught how to think on their own, to question assumptions, and to take individual responsibility.
At the charter school my daughter currently attends, the children are the most polite I’ve ever been around. They open doors for parents and each other; they say, “Yes ma'am,” or “No, sir”; they are exceptionally kind to each other. They act like this because it's part of the curriculum and expected. They are challenged each day in small learning groups that are ability-based allowing each student to learn at the level that best suits them. Expectations are high. I believe these kids act in a way that is noticeably different.
My daughter won a lottery position to attend this charter school and we were able to transfer her from the private school. Hey, I'm not stupid; there's no reason to keep paying for private school when the charter accomplishes my main goals. If you aren't seeing a significant difference between private school education and what you can find at the public schools, then absolutely stop wasting your money.
#5 Cost Matters
Some of you are parents or grandparents that have “Enough” or “Beyond Enough.” If that is the case, why not look at private schooling if it could give the children you care about “more.” If you aren't in that position of Enough yet, but feel the acute need that your child needs “more,” then you still have options! You can move into a better performing school district, find special programs within the public schools that can better meet your kid's needs, you can homeschool, find a charter school, or sacrifice like crazy to afford a great private school. All are viable options for helping a child reach their potential—all without feeling any guilt (as long as you save that 20% for retirement!).
What do you think? What does private high school in your area cost? What financial sacrifices have you made to put your kids in private school? Do you think it's worth the cost? Why or why not? Have you considered moving to a better school district? Do you think families have a moral obligation to keep their children in the public schools? Comment below!
Loading ...[This updated post was originally published in 2018.]
Another con to private education is that kids will associate with other affluent kids with a higher percentage of spend thrifty parents. They have a very high potential to learning bad habits from their peers. I hope that not a single one of my kids one day comes to me and thinks they deserve a BMW for their 16th birthday because all their friends got new cars for their’s. Just the thought of that makes me angry.
Great post, great comments. A couple of things, my public schooled kids made good money tutoring private school kids in college, they also got 100% free rides for their college degrees, something few private school kids did. But my kids were great students and very intelligent and would have blown away their competition anyway in all probability. I do differ on one thing though, kids going to private school reduces the cost of public education without reducing the funding. I think that had to help my smart kids because the schools had extra money paid by private school parents in taxes to spend on my kids. But in short my opinion is private education is a waste of good money and often insulates kids from diversity and the real world to their detriment. I think in most cases it is a well meaning but expensive and counterproductive practice.
Jim, I probably missed it in the above banter, but I’m curious about a response to Jill’s #2/3 points about moving out of a mediocre/bad area or deciding to simply live in a good area and how that squares with the public good idea. Worse performing schools are lucky to get a parent to show up to a parent teacher conference whereas better performing schools have parents who have already set up meetings at the sign of trouble. As you state, the funding is typically there regardless via taxes. And funding does not independently correlate well with performance, BTW. I think your argument revolves more around siphoning away involved parents. So if that’s the case shouldn’t you be opposed to moving out of worse performing school districts? And if you are seeing clear underperformance of a school why is it your obligation to continue sending your child there? Whether you choose to move or send your kid to private school the effect is the same – an involved parent not involved anymore in that school district. Someone else will buy your home and the taxes will keep coming either way, so it’s not a funding concern.
To be clear I have zero intention of sending my children to private school at any point. However, I respect the free market principles underlying freedom of choice – it holds an otherwise monopolistic power accountable. The idea of education and making it mandatory, I agree, serves a public good. But just like any other service it needs to be held accountable to the concept of value for the individual. Making schooling mandatory and allowing free choice would seem to satisfy both of those ideals, would it not?
It’s dilemma for sure, and a valid criticism. I probably need to spend more time thinking about it.
Not sure where you live Sophia, but in the Philadelphia region there are private Catholic Prep schools that are 20-25k a year and students ONLY start there in high school. My wife and I were the products of public schools. I attended inner city schools (white kid battling in the stairwells every day) and she attended the best district in the state. When I made a career change I went into education and it was my teaching experiences in several top districts that made our choice to go private an easy one. I can say my son’s education at his all boys prep school was BEYOND amazing in every aspect. Every one of his teachers had a graduate degree and over half had their doctorates and actually worked in their fields before teaching. The atmosphere of not trying to impress girls all day has an amazing effect on boys. The school’s arts, STEM and athletic programs were second to none. A funny note, our public high school would have won state championships in several sports year in and year out, but the top athletes in soccer, hockey and track ended up at my son’s school instead.
Awesome post! I enjoyed reading two opposing views on this topic and I think this is an EXTREMELY relevant FINANCIAL post for most of us.
I honestly don’t understand the readers getting their panties in a twist because you shared your view on something they don’t consider to be “in line with the mission of this blog.”
After all WCI has contributed and all of the people it has helped… maybe readers that don’t care for this article could just keep quiet?? I find it rude to criticize a site that puts out so much great content.
Thanks for all you do!
I live in Boston(Brighton) local school system is drained by Charter schools and Busing kids to the suburbs. You are not even guaranteed your zone school in the city. you 4yr could have to ride the bus for an hour. the Highschools worth going to you have to test in. I’m Black and all the other black Professions put their kids in private school because data suggest that the achievement gap is lower. even professional in a suburban district like Brookline and Newton. I have heard horror stories about wonderful school systems where teachers don’t believe a black student can do math or science and the expectations for them are lowered. also, the achievement gap for black boys and punishment for infraction are worse. Daycare cost $3000 a month where I live(Bright Horizons) if I have to pay that so they are in a happy environment and can be successful I will. Both my wife and I went to public school but due to quality and care needs(after school) we decided to on private for now. Also buying a home in places with a good school system is double the cost($800k vs 1,5mill)
To the point in your last line- yes, it costs more to get into a more expensive area, but at least you get some of that back when you sell and there are other benefits to being in the nicer area typically.
Pretty amazing to see how much affects these decisions based on the comments – religion, politics, race, child-rearing philosophy, financial philosophy etc.
Well, you are the boss and she’s the assistant editor. That’s all I need to know!
I felt WCI’s arguments for public schools were spot on. I think it is rather foolish to pay high property taxes to be in a superior school district and then not take advantage of the schools in that district. The cost of educating your children at private schools is likely not commensurate with the value provided, unless there are special circumstances for your child that would justify the extra expense.
Growing up I attended both public and private schools, and I attended an Ivy league college and graduate school, however I would not credit private schools for my achievements. I have likewise seen many send their children to obscenely expensive private schools, only to watch them go to un-ranked colleges that provide an education that is likely even below what our state university would have provided. The best kept secret in this country is the phenomenal education provided by honors programs in public HS and in our state university systems.
I found Jills arguments less convincing, and guided more by what appear to be her political views against “government schools” than anything else. Still I respect the decisions people make with their own money and appreciate her alternative view points to WCI. Much to consider in this debate, and I dont think there is a wrong answer, just what works for your family.
There are a few more factors that came into play when deciding to send our 3 children to private school.
1. Back in 2002-2004, when our oldest child was in 2nd-3rd grade, public school funding was so bad, the very dysfunctional public school administration was going to end the school year in early April! The parents of our semi-affluent neighborhood offered to pay the teacher’s salary for that extra 6-8 weeks, and she agreed. We even were going to cover any parents who couldn’t afford to do so. Then the school stated we couldn’t use school property to do that, and we were planning to hold school at the local brewpub. The problem became solved at the very last minute with an emergency bond measure. However, our schools are chronically underfunded, and, even in the most desirable high school in our city, they still don’t have enough desks for each student, some standing in the back of the 40+ person class.
2. My oldest was in the TAG (talented and gifted) program, which simply meant they were handed extra paper exercises and writing assignments.
3. The age difference between our kids had an impact on our decision re affordability. They were 4 and 5 years apart, so the expensive high school (25k – 30k/year) was fortunately only one tuition at a time.
4. Our family is multilingual, and we wanted the children to be fluent in 2-3 languages as well. They went to a foreign language immersion school for 8+ years, and were able to do extended exchanges, living with families in foreign countries in 5th, 8th, and 11th grade. Despite being in private school, we believe they gained a worldly and diverse perspective.
Although we drive older cars, we still contribute 25% of our gross to retirement.
I think for our family the religious piece is huge. I want my children to be learning at daycare and school what I would be teaching them at home if I was able to be a stay at home parent.
Full disclosure that I have personal experience with both and no particular opinion. But what I do find strange is that parents often don’t look at the financial opportunity cost of private school.
In NYC private school is 52k a year and there are a large number of very good, even excellent, public schools. While there are many extremely wealthy families in NYC with HHIs in the millions and savings to match, there are also many MC and UMC parents scraping to send their kids to private school.
I’m not knocking anyone’s choice, but 52k a year (and this doesn’t count the substantial annual tuition increases or expected giving) compounded at 7% over 12 years comes out to 1.2mm. That’s a huge nest egg that would allow your child to attend pretty much any college debt free and maybe even grad school, or get on the very pricey NYC property ladder. Yet I rarely hear parents weighing a decent public education plus 1.2mm (or more) vs private school. It’s all about the experience, personal attention etc. Those can be really important, and in NYC private school connections can be career makers. But I don’t think I’ve ever spent 1.2 mm on anything- not medschool, not my house, and it’s hard for me to imagine (superwealthy aside) that any education is worth 1.2 mm more than a free one.
Our society is moving more and more to a capital and inheritance-based financial situation where education matters much less financially than it did thirty years ago. I really wonder if the MC/UMC has actually made the hard, cold financial calculations on this. Or if they have read Thomas Piketty.
I’ve got an article coming out about that point very soon. It’s not really a decision of “public vs private.” It’s public + a fully funded retirement vs private.
Team Jim!
Ugh Jill i was managing my way through the entitlement your post dripped with but your continuous use of the right wing buzzword “government” schools made me completely unable to take you seriously.
Personally I believe private school to be immoral and elitist in most situations. You are turning your back on society with the attitude that your kids are more “special” than others and deserve more.
Be a citizen.
Completely agree with Kimberly!
Kimberly,
You are entitled to state your opinion, but I think you are way off base in reading “right wing” in Jill’s well written post.
As I declared in my early post, we sent two of our kids to private school and two to public school and thus do not have strong feelings for either end of the spectrum. Our decisions were based on what we felt was best for each child, and we were most thankful to have the choices.
As far as “immoral”, wow! Hyperbole doesn’t become you!
I don’t know that “right wing” is off base, but immoral certainly is.
I thought I edited out “government” and replaced it with public each time I saw it. I agree it’s a word used primarily by those who tend to lean right with their politics. We took a lot of that stuff out so people wouldn’t focus on those political issues and would focus on the arguments instead. I find that’s really hard for people to do though. It’s like when I disguise somebody’s specialty/gender/location for a Q&A post and then all the commenters spend their time trying to figure it out.
I really appreciate what you tried to do and it was brave because you were willing to take the heat to bring these subjects up in this audience. People get very defensive when things they have done and their parents have done are questioned. I stand by immoral but notice I didn’t say 100% of the time always immoral, I did leave some room for exceptions and any given person could be that exception . Not everyone’s morality needs to match also! They are personal decisions I understand that. These are just my convictions. But I am from the working class which is a pretty minority perspective in medicine and colors my perspective greatly!
It kind of seemed like a blanket statement to me (with respect to immorality). Maybe you didn’t intend it. Still, I’m interested in why you think sending children to private school is immoral.
Tommy: I am not going to speak for Kimberly, but I happen to agree with her sentiments, so I will attempt to offer my views on why I believe it is wrong to choose private over public schools in most cases.
I think if there is a religious need, or desire, or a child has a special need that only a private institution can address, or you live in a poor school district, then these are the exception. But the challenge here is this, for all others:
Point 1: We live in a society that unfortunately does not value education, or teachers the way it should. By choosing private schools over public, you are giving up on the public school system, which then harms us all, as a society. At some point there needs to be a consideration of whether we are going to work towards a better society, or just all be a bunch of rich people selfishly pursuing our own objectives. I am not saying you do not have a responsibility to provide what is best for your children, you do, we all do. But there is a balance between societal benefit, and our parental roles. I doubt any of our children would be “harmed” if they attended public schools. Yet by taking your children and sequestering them in a private school, you are robbing the public of their thoughts, ideas and talents, which harms us all.
Point 2: The public school systems that most of us in the high income world tend to have access to, are fantastic schools. To choose private over public, is in a sense, wasting your money, and the investments that went into those schools, paid for with your tax dollars.
Point 3: Going to private schools has absolutely no advantage for your child in college admissions or any other endeavor, unless you are interested in simply looking cool at the country club. I am worth nine figures, I live in a neighborhood with seven figure and up estates, and my children attend public schools, why?
First-Because I am a proud citizen of the United States, and I believe in the power of public education to provide social mobility, in fact it is the cornerstone of equal opportunity in America. In our case, the schools in our area are fantastic and offer them a phenomenal educational opportunity.
Second, I do not want my children to be surrounded by only rich kids, and be sheltered, which is routinely what you find at elite private schools. They are already sheltered enough given our neighborhood, and lifestyle.
Finally, academic research has confirmed over, and over again, that private schools do not provide a better education for children. nor do they predict better college attainment, careers, or income.
In the end, I think that private schools are a lot like active management; they make grandiose promises, charge you a fortune, and ultimately under perform.
Conversely, most parents sending their children to private school believe they are providing the best possible opportunity for their own children to succeed. That’s true regardless of the kind of “school” the kids are attending and would certainly include vocational classes (e.g. learning to use a 3D printer), private tutors, test prep services and high-end sports programs. It’s elitist by definition (money & free time), but certainly isn’t immoral. It’s called parenting. A solid chunk of those parents also struggle mightily to earn the extra money and make the additional time available.
Would the counter argument ask parents to do nothing additional whatsoever to support their own kids?
Helping your children on an individual level may not benefit society in the short term, but few people would consider it wrong.
Kimberly,
It’s the other way around. Our bureaucratic public school district and our state were the ones who turned their backs on my children, due to their lack of political will to provide adequate funding for elementary and high school education. If I can afford to keep my children from having to stand in the back of a 40 student classroom, I will.
Thanks for pointing out that a big disadvantage of private schools is their siphoning of resources that could go towards public schools. My family just moved to a new area, so we’ve been trying to decide if we should enroll our kids in public or private school. I hadn’t considered that private schools affect the resources and students of public schools, so thanks for pointing that out!
I like how you mentioned that a private school allows your child to challenge themselves, where public schools tend to hold back potential. We are just about to move into a new area and need a school to get our kids in. Looking into private schools seems like a great idea to ensure that they can meet their own potential.
B.S. You’re a spammer trying to get a link to your private school onto this website. Get a life.
I like what you said about kids having a more kind demeanor when attending a private school because it’s part of the curriculum. When it comes to a high school scenario, private schools seem beneficial because they teach lasting values and applicable lessons. My son is about to enter high school, so I’ll consider the benefits of enrolling him in a private school in order to give him the best education possible.
Thanks for sharing this excellent blog about private school pro and cons. keep blogging!
My child has been enrolled in a private school a year ago and i m very happy with the results. Not only because she is scoring good marks but the kind of cooperation provided by school to parents regarding kids development and need is excellent. I understand it is very difficult job for a caring parent to choose the best school for their child but there are some schools that provide very safe environment for your child to grow and develop. Private schools are expensive but they do have better resources and facilities and they provide best meals to kids so that parents don’t have to worry. My daughter is now going to one of the best international schools in Bahrain, the Beacon Private school. Here you can get more information about school – https://www.beacon.edu.bh/
I teach at a private school. Do not lose sleep over losing the children of MORAL parents to private schools. Not a wink.
I avoid them all! Schools (both public and private) were set up to create dependent adults, and the evidence of this can clearly be seen just by taking a quick look around at our culture. Concepts such as student loans, mortgages, rent, car notes, retirement, consumer debt, and so on, basically spending a lifetime struggling to pay the bank, will be foreign concepts to them. (I also do not bring school home. I did not keep my kids out of school just to bring school into my home. To me that would defeat the purpose.)
In my blog, Raising School-Free Kids, I write about a simple investment plan that my husband and I have created to ensure that our children are financially independent by no later than age twenty-five. The banks will be paying them, not the other way around. Let me put it to you this way, if I wanted my children to become dependent adults I would send them to school. But of course, I don’t so I will not be shutting them away behind four walls of any schoolhouse for thirteen or so years – the entirety of their youth- Good Gawd! For those parents who are interested go to schoolfreekids.com to find out more.
By the way, my husband and I are university/college instructors and we don’t want our children going anywhere near those places.
But I want to leave off with this: Parents you don’t have to follow the herd off the cliff! You can avoid the whole damn circus altogether. Your children do not belong to the government or to anybody else. They belong to you. Wake up! Quit letting them do this to your kids.
Well that’s an extreme idea.
I can certainly make my kids FI by 25 (probably by 15 honestly) but I’m not sure that’s doing them a favor.
Hope your plan works out well for you and your kids. Maybe we’ll all be doing it in a few more years. Given the plethora of internet learning resources and the wasted time at school, it wouldn’t surprise me if just as much learning could take place at home in half the time so maybe you’re right.
Oh, neat. Thanks for the response.
Once upon a time it was extreme to send your kids to school. The concept of handing over your child is fairly recent. It wasn’t until 1852 that the government forced you to send your kids to school, and parents were not happy with this. I have read at least a dozen books on this topic, and counting. My favorite being, The Underground History of American Education, written by Jon Taylor Gatto. I think I read somewhere that by about the 1920s, 80 some percent of parents were sending their to kids school, and now we barely even question it.
So I do agree that today I’m certainly not in the norm, but I wouldn’t say that’s a bad thing. We have been so conditioned to hand over our kids that now we call it extreme if we don’t want to. I wouldn’t allow my children to ever play in traffic. That’s extreme, but certainly not a bad thing at all. But today we are no longer forced to hand over our kids. Thank God. And I live in one of the best states for that.
I think I am doing my kids a favor. I think they are going to be thankful that their father and I are making sure they are not going to be living in desperate mode for the next 60 years of their lives, they’re not going to be dependent on a job, and as I mentioned before, spending a lifetime struggling to pay the bank , and so on. My soon to be eleven year old son is already thankful.
I say by at least age 25, they will be financially independent. Who knows maybe 15. But every single penny earned, saved and invested is coming from them, so they might not make FI by 15.
I’m not sure if we’ll all be doing this in a few years, and it’s okay if we don’t. I am totally for people living the way they want to live their lives. But I can imagine in the future, maybe about 100 years or so from now, there will be a book written and it will be titled something like this, “The Rise and Fall of Compulsory Schooling, What the Hell Were We Thinking.”
But I don’t want to convince and defend. That was actually done for me back in the 70s by some really great people. I want to inform and encourage those parents who are interested in being free. Again, I’m just glad my husband and I can raise our children the way we want to . Good luck to you, as well.
You might want to double check your assumption about consistent, year after year returns of 10% after taxes from putting money “in the bank”. (Sure, you mention using one of Dave Ramsey’s recommended mutual funds “with a good history”, but you still are unlikely to clear 10% net of taxes, fees, and other expenses every year.
You also might check the math on at $150K the kids will take out at age 26. You don’t appear to have reduced the principal by the right amount. Obvious math errors on a “school’s overrated” blog seem like a bad combination.
Both of my kids went to above average but not excellent public schools. This was real world experience. In one art class, one kid was partnered with a kid wearing an ankle bracelet on probation for drug dealing. Their class sizes were typically quite large — mid 30s. They learned to be self motivated. One kid scored twelve 5s and one 4 on 13 AP tests. One got into Harvard. The other to Yale. Both went on to Med schools: one is now completing an OB-GYN residency and the other is doing an emergency medicine residency. We saved a fortune and the kids, I’m convinced, were vastly better prepared for college and life by virtue of their real world experiences in public schools, where their academic success depended more on their own initiative and dedication than on spoon feeding.
I work off of two premises: 1) schools (both pubic and private) were set up to create dependent adults, and do create dependent adults;
2) the concept that as a parent I must start sending my child off somewhere for the entirety of his youth to be herded around with all the other kids, in order for him to get some kind of normal, proper development, is something I just do not agree with.
Parents who get those two ideas will most benefit from what I have to say. (Those are the parents who don’t want to put their kids in school, and there are tons of them.) Parents who don’t get those two ideas, won’t benefit from what I have to say, and so should just move along, as they will find that they will just be wasting their time.
As I stated before, I don’t want to convince anyone or defend anything. That already has been done for me by some really wonderful people, so that today, parents have the choice of sending their kids to school. We are no longer living in the days when government forces parents to send their children to school, and I am thankful for that. I find nothing appealing about school. Definitely not shoving my kid in a schoolroom full of thirty other people. I would not want that done to me, so I will not do that to them.
But I do want to inform and encourage those parents who don’t want to put their kids in school. Hopefully my blog, Raising School-Free Kids: A Path to a Life of Independence, offers help to those parents who are needing it. The parent who I was over a decade ago. I have read so much on this topic, and I am still reading so much on this topic, but nothing offered a clear cut path to a clear goal that I wanted to reach, so I had to create one for myself. (They all actually kind of sound the same to me.)
I guess other people’s ideas of success, including yours, are not my idea of success. No offense, it’s just not. As far as spoon feeding is concerned, I don’t know what you’re implying there. Having my kids obtain marketable job skills, contributing to the market place by age 11, then saving and investing their money is the opposite of spoon feeding. It’s called not wasting their time. It’s called helping other people. It’s called independence. We’ve just been conditioned, by schooling, to see independence as a bad thing.
My eleven-year old is now mowing lawns, and is in the process of looking for a job as a dog walker. Today his father just opened his own bank account for him, and had another discussion with him about budgeting, saving, and investing his money. He is on track to getting his junior black belt this fall or winter. (Something he has been working on since he was seven.) He attends a parent/ child community gardening class at our local park, where he has learned how to grow and harvest his own food. He plays in a Pokemon league, where he has learned from some guys a lot older than him. He is now starting to program in Python (he got his mad programming skills from his father and Codecademy). Also, something he has been working hard at for years, since age five, to get to this point. This is hardly spoon feeding. Quite the opposite.
That is a very interesting worldview that looks at public schools as “set up to create dependent adults.” Not sure I agree with that. But I can see how if someone did why they would go to all this trouble to find an alternative.
Thank you for your reply.
It’s not a matter of disagreeing or agreeing. It just is. It’s like if I were to say there are oak trees outside my window, and someone would come by and say, “I don’t think I agree with that.” I would say, well there are still oak trees outside my window. It’s a fact. As I mentioned in a previous comment, there are many books written on the origins of schooling. My favorite being The Underground History of American Education, written by Jon Taylor Gatto. It is a big book, comprehensive and thorough, a great read. If you don’t have time to read it, although I highly recommend reading this book, you can just do an internet search on the origins of schooling. YouTube has some good stuff.
Trouble? It’s no trouble at all. Sending my kids to school and having to put up with the system telling my family what to do is something I would consider troubling. But out here we are free. In my last comment, I was specifically talking about how my children are working, saving, and investing. Those are basic principles that everyone should be doing. You know that, you are The White Coat Investor. : )
We’re just not used to it. Schooling has conditioned us into thinking that we need to spend about 20 years of our life sitting around in a schoolhouse all day. Then only after all that trouble are you able to start working at a job that matters and earning money that counts. Unbelievable. I’m so glad I have broken out of that dependent way of thinking. Again, my children learn marketable job skills, contribute to the marketplace, get compensated in return, then save and invest their earnings. I wouldn’t describe what I am doing with my kids as going to “all this trouble.” I would describe what I am doing with my kids as simple, yet profound.
I think we’re going to have to agree to disagree on that point.
You get what you pay for. We live in a desirable area to where people move so they can benefit from the public schools. Personally, I have nothing good to say. Public school failed my daughter. She was one of those students that was nothing more than a number. In second grade she was diagnosed (on MY dime, and that’s not a cheap evaluation) with severe dyslexia, which I may add, was never even recognized by any of the public school teachers she had. She learns differently. She’s not stupid. She’s not unable to learn. Public school put her in with kids with severe disabilities – kids that are incapable of learning. Fast forward several [wasted] years, countless Special Ed meetings, IEP’s, aid support, and bullying issues (because she was pulled out of class for math and reading). My daughter couldn’t read. Like at all. In 6th grade. Somehow she made the honor roll. When I asked how she made the honor roll when she still couldn’t read I was told “she’s doing great, for her”. I’ve no doubt that she’d have been passed along, given a free grade that wasn’t earned, never having been challenged, and probably would’ve fallen in with the wrong crowd. We turned to private school and haven’t looked back since. Fast forward several more years, and my daughter is now on the honor roll with a grade she worked hard to earn. She reads a grade above her level (she’s now a junior reading at
a senior level), she is polite, respectful, confident, self advocating, and an absolute pleasure to be around. I’ve gone broke to provide this opportunity for her and don’t regret it even for a second. It’s worth every single sacrifice. She plans to continue her education after high school, something she never thought she was smart enough to do until the last 2 years or so. I’ve paid for a college education just getting her through high school. I pay my taxes (of which 95% go to public schools) and don’t get any discounts or even transportation provided (I pay a driver), and I don’t complain even though I’d really like to. I don’t see how any of that “takes away” from public school. Private school teachers where I live, incidentally, are paid less and don’t get all the entitlements as public school teachers. I find that they care more, work harder, and genuinely love what they do whereas public school teachers seldom “go the extra mile” for their students. I’m sure there are exceptions to the rule but I’ve not seen it in any of the teachers my daughter had (or the teachers I had throughout my public school education, most of whom had tenure). Private school isn’t cheap but I gladly go broke paying the tuition year after year. I end with my first comment; you get what you pay for.
My wife and I are considering sending our K-12 kids to a private school, so we are grateful that we stumbled upon this post as we find it to be really informative. I find it interesting that private schools will teach a rigorous curriculum with students being assigned to breakout learning groups with students that are on the same academic level. My wife and I would want an educational experience where our kids are also taught to be responsible and critical thinking and I think private school education can accomplish just that.
This is a totally different conversation about public school when your state, New Mexico, ranks among the lowest 3 states in education. What do you do then?
It doesn’t matter what your state ranks, what is the quality of the local public school? I’m sure even New Mexico has at least some good public schools, no?
I worked in several different preschools for about 6 years. I now teach in a public school. The biggest difference I noticed was that in private school there was a “customer is always right” attitude. So parents could complain and they would get their way. I was expected to do the impossible to please everyone, even if it was only at first glance. However, they always had a lot of privilege, and parents were very involved.
Both sides have very good points. Before I was a parent, I never thought I would even consider attending a private school and paying a seemingly unnecessary tuition.
We started off with public school for our oldest child. But, after 2 months in, we transferred him to an independent school we had toured a couple of times. We really wanted it to work out at our local public school, but his needs were not met and we could tell his anxiety had significantly increased. By the end of the day, he was exhausted and felt kind of down on himself for being in trouble all day. He was diagnosed ASD, but his symptoms were mild and an IEP or 504 plan was denied by the public school. Without going into all of the details, we were continuously shocked at how he was treated by his teacher. I volunteered my time in the school and witnessed some of the other teachers yelling at kids already in tears crying. This was a #1 rated public school in our area. Also there are some problems with the older kids in the area. Several times I have seen posts on our neighborhood FB page asking to “please talk to your child about not bullying or name calling on the way to school”.
He is much happier at the independent school and we have our younger son there as well. Schools are so much more than education. It is also about community, care, social/emotional awareness, healthy meals, and teaching kindness. As a huge advocate of managing money well and making smart investment decisions, I have come to find that experiences and quality of life matter quite a bit too. Now, full disclosure, we most likely would not be spending money on tuition if we were not able to max out retirement accounts, set up 529s, and still save extra. We keep our means in check in other ways. Also, I fully believe if a person wants something bad enough, they are going to find a way to pay for it. Wanting our kids at the private school has inspired us to start a side business to earn some extra $ to help pay for it. We also re-evaluate the decision every year and enter them into 1 or 2 of the charter school lotteries to keep our options open.
As for moving to another area, that is a no-go for me. I have lived in another state before and came right back to my home area. I have 8 generations of family that have lived here and I am well-rooted! It’s a very prosperous and fast-growing area.
No school or experience is perfect, but everyone has to do what is best for their child and individual situation. I do go back and forth several times over the decision to spend money on tuition, and eventually see, hear, or read about something that reminds me why we do it so we end up staying every year after 5 years at the school now. So far no regrets.